25 Comments

I'll see your Dont Know What You Got and raise you a Nobody's Fool

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Great article! I had the mullet and was clipping Husker Du and Minutemen articles in '87 as well. I saw Cinderella open for AC/DC around that same time and they were pretty good!

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It’s funny, as I was reading “The songs themselves lacked genuine, passionate, inspired songwriting chops.” it was Poison that came to mind. I was thinking to myself “what about every rose has its thorns?” and then in the very next paragraph you mentioned that very song! Although I wouldn’t describe myself as a Poison fan, I did enjoy some of their music (“Something to Believe In” was certainly a favorite).

I’m grateful to have finally arrived at the point in my life (only took 52 years 😝) where I don’t give a damn about what anybody thinks of my musical tastes. I no longer have “guilty pleasures” or worry about “not being cool” (whatever that even means). It’s liberating to enjoy what I enjoy without reference to what anybody else thinks!

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If someone were to ask me in public if I liked Whitesnake’s “Here I Go Again” I would adamantly and strongly say “No!” But afterwards, I might just go home and secretly listen to it...

A favorite song of mine on the theme of not realizing what you had until it’s gone is William Bell’s You Don’t Miss Your Water. (Bell was a house writer for Stax.) Otis Redding plays it on his Otis Blue album. Sturgill Simpson played a great cover when he was touring in 2017/18:

https://youtu.be/hpNqKd51Bo4?si=zdmRLxfxMY4Gdctt

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Wow - what a deep-in-the-belly cover that is! I was actually at Hardly Strictly Bluegrass that year but didn't see Sturgill perform, so this is fantastic. Thanks for sharing! And "Here I Go Again" is a classic fist pumper! I feel that Whitesnake sort of skirts hair metal, but is really just a rock band. I mean, they were all established musicians way before the scene and took advantage of a music video trend that was successful (bringing in hot Hollywood actresses -- R.I.P. Tawny Kitaen).

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Well, I am a "hairiest", according to some on Jays in the House, so I loved the era of lucious locks. I even like the mullet! Shouldn't surprise you I also like hair metal, what I heard of as I didn't really go deep into the genre. Looks like I will have to revisit Cinderella.

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What is Jays in the House? Oh, I just looked it up. Blue Jays of course! I would have thought they would call women into hair metal "Harriets" and maybe the woman with the longest hair would be the hairiest Harriet? Now I'm wondering which bands were the biggest Canadian hair metal bands. I know Bryan Adams is Canadian, and he did have songs during that time, but clearly isn't hair metal. But he could have pulled it off if he wanted! I imagine he will grace your digital pages at some point soon.

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Don't hold your breath for Bryan Adams. I'm pretty lukewarm on him. I just looked at this list and I say it's between Helix and Honeymoon Suite. I love the latter.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Category:Canadian_glam_metal_musical_groups

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Pretty Boy Floyd was the only one I recognized. You must have had a rough summer of '69 to be so lukewarm on the BA!:) Not even, "Everything I Do I Do For You"? I used to jokingly sing this to my boss at my last job everytime he asked me to do another dumb task.

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It may be a case of having heard them so much when they came out. A hit song that also fit Canadian content regulations? Play it every hour baby!

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I'm listening to DKWYG as I write this - and it's probably the first time I've heard it in ... 30 years or more? And probably the first time I've actually LISTENED to it - and it's really good! A brilliant, tick-all-the-boxes power ballad with actual heart. I was definitely surrounded by hair metal in my early/mid-teens, but as I was more into tie dye it wasn't really my scene. Which is why it probably blended into all the others - Ratt, Poison, Whitesnake, etc. And I fully appreciate your comment that they didn't call themselves Sinderella - or Sïndërellä .... great to see some restraint when that wasn't guaranteed!

Sorry your carpal tunnel's prevented a new post - that's not fun. But thanks for the repost!

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Thanks, Bryan. It really holds up after 35 years (can it really have been that long?) doesn’t it? Seeing how good they were live made me reevaluate them a couple decades ago. And thanks for the kind words about my gimpy hands/wrists.

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Gimpy hands/wrists are the least of our worries these days, I fear. I can't go up/down stairs without my knees reminding me that things fall apart ... But at least I can still dance in my head. Which, to be fair, is where most of my dancing was done!

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The things I did to my hair because the '80s decided it needed to defy gravity. Great article Steve about a musical phenomenon that came and went as quickly as Aqua Net's stock price!

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Thanks! My sister was in hair styling school back then, so I was subject to all manner of crazy hairstyles, including a poodle perm. That photo will remain in a locked safe! Always appreciate your comments and of course, your newsletter!

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After reading this piece, the only thing I thought was to google grand pianos on a beach. And the hair stuff was interesting too, but not as much as a piano on a beach. So if you want more sandy piano: https://youtu.be/Xy7DOkRp4KE?si=haLLMKHRbTk9dw2l

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I knew I could provide info for one of your special Macko posts sharing odd videos and websites! There is a scene in the TV show Mrs. Davis (excellent show BTW), where hundreds of grand pianos are in a field. I imagine it was mostly SFX.

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Yeah, not sure why I thought about pianos when I read your great piece about hair bands...¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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I think it’s because you still maintain a full, lush head of hair, and so the pianos stood out a bit more than the boldness theme! :-)

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Great piece Steve! You are right on point regarding power ballads. Lots of bands can thrash, but pulling off a great power ballad is what sets the musicians apart from the mere bangers. Oh, and it finally hit me--your humor reminds me of Rodney Dangerfield's.

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Thanks, Charles! Pulling off an effective power-ballad is indeed a special art. And Rodney Dangerfield? "I don't get no respect around here!"

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Great piece; and fully agree re: Keifer. Hair metal is a pleasure without guilt for me. My hair has always been too fine and resistant to curling etc. to be styled and sprayed into submission as was expected back then. That's a mighty fine mullet you had, though... reminds me of my brother's.

Regarding hair loss: it's often related to androgens. Men have different patterns of hair loss than women, so some of it is sex-linked/genetic; some of it is related to stress and other environmental influences too: https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Pattern_hair_loss&oldid=1182299052

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Thanks! I had read something about it often skipping a generation, meaning that the grandparents play a bigger role in it than one’s parents. My dad still has a thick head of hair and would joke that my mom must have had sex with the milkman. Well, I was always an anxious kid (and adult) so maybe that played a bigger role than I had thought. Still wonder about the ring of hair that doesn’t stop growing.

I didn’t really like hair metal much at the time, but came to appreciate a lot of it later. To me,the best songs are essentially pop songs with some added reverb and a guitar solo.

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It's been a while since I taught developmental psych, but my understanding is that the gene(s?) responsible for pattern baldness are on the X chromosome, which means that they come from a boy's mother (females can only pass X chromosomes, while males can pass X or Y chromosomes to the next generation). And the patterns of baldness differ in part because not all hair follicles are equally sensitive to androgen levels.

I never looked at hair metal that way, but I'm not finding much fault with it... sometimes piano is in the mix (heh) too, but the guitar solo is mandatory for sure.

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